After divorce, living your life happily is truly the ultimate goal now and in the future. But how do you get there? And how can avoid your new status as “single” from turning into the feeling of “being alone” and lonely? Here are the tips you need to start building a life you love!
Take a Deep Breath: Divorce has many challenges, including legal battles, handling financial issues, and dealing with any children involved. If your divorce was especially combative, accepting that your marriage is over and the lengthy legal fights behind you can — sometimes unexpectedly — leave an emotional vacuum. Your divorce may have been all-consuming and now that it is over, you may feel adrift. This is why many therapists compare bouncing back from divorce like a grieving process. You need to give yourself time to process the emotions, from sadness to anger to denial to finally, acceptance. It takes time to heal. Feeling loneliness may simply be a step you need to pass through on your way to closure and the ability to move on.
Baby Steps: There are a thousand ways that you can begin to move forward and combat any isolation that you may now feel. Get online and start researching adult education classes or support groups. Revive a hobby that you may have set aside some time ago or consider taking up a new activity that you always wanted to try. Exercise is great for your mood, so think about joining a gym or taking some exercise classes in your community. If you are a pet person, consider adopting a dog or cat for some new companionship. Dogs are especially great in social situations like dog parks where you can socialize yourself and your new best friend!
New Relationships: Perhaps dating is the next chapter for you? While dating may not be something you consider immediately, especially if you are recently divorced, this may be a step for you to explore in the future. No matter your age or how long your past marriage was, it is always possible for you to move forward with a new relationship if you wish. Try online dating or social gatherings such as speed dating to get yourself back out there.
Do the Emotional Work: Remember, divorce does not have to be a permanent state of being. It is for sure the end of one phase of your life, but you need to strive to also make it the start of a new and happier phase. Do not let your fears keep you trapped in a bad marriage, simply because you cannot imagine being alone. You will learn to live in your new life and thrive. Among some actual benefits that people often mention are an increased sense of independence, weight loss, better relationships with children and family and a freedom to explore other relationships.
Stress-Free Future: Sometimes divorce legal issues can crop up even after your decree is granted if changes are needed with custody arrangements and support payments, and related issues. Please note: You don’t have to put yourself through the wringer again! If you are in need, find a knowledgeable and experienced attorneys in your area to get some guidance and learn your rights. You are not required to hire the same attorney who handled your divorced to represent you in post-divorce matters. Find an attorney with whom you can have a good working relationship; one who clearly understands your goals and what is most important to you.
Deciding to end a bad marriage is a difficult and yet powerful step in your life. Take stock of your life and decide what means most to you right now. If you have legal issues related to your divorce that you need to discuss, please contact us to schedule your initial consultation with one of our qualified New Jersey divorce and family law attorneys.