Kelly’s emotion was understandable. She was angry and hurt and she, in her own way, was standing up for her mother, Sharon, during a very difficult time. However, as she is now realizing, it is probably not the smartest course of action to engage the person with whom your spouse or family member had the affair. There can be serious repercussions.
If you discover that your spouse is cheating on you, of course, there is going to be anger and resentment. As tempting as it may be, do not contact your spouse’s paramour in any fashion, be it directly or via social media. You could be subjecting yourself to not only a civil lawsuit, such as Kelly Osbourne is now facing, but also to criminal charges such as harassment, if your conduct is frequent or threatening. Also, do not have friends or family members contact the person; third-party contact can come back to you as harassment, as well.
Further, any behaviors such as harassing this person or showing up at their home or work can haunt you in the divorce proceedings later on. If you are seen by the court as unstable, in need of anger management, or a threat to someone, this can certainly affect your child custody or parenting time rights. You do not want to be viewed as someone who cannot care for or spend time with their children because of a split-second decision to seek revenge. It is simply not worth it.
If you are feeling that your anger is out of control, seek the advice of a therapist who is trained to help people going through a divorce. The therapist can provide you with a safe place to express your anger and can also give you some tips and tricks for handling your anger in future situations with your spouse. Sit down with your family law attorney and set a plan of action for your upcoming divorce, if you have decided to file. Creating a plan will keep you focused and help to remove the emotion from the situation.
Remember, as stated by Rick Reynolds, LCSW of AffairRecovery.com, “Don’t compromise your personal integrity by acting in ways you normally would never approve of. Injuring another will never bring the peace you seek, and it will only lengthen the amount of time it’s going to take to recover…The last thing you want to do is let another person have the power to control your peace of mind.”
Mr. Reynolds also points out, “You don’t want to act in ways that allow the other person to believe your mate was justified in coming to them. If you act like a crazy person in confronting them, you only give them justification for their actions.”
If you have discovered that your spouse is cheating and you wish to learn your legal rights and obligations, please contact us today to schedule your initial consultation with one of our experienced and compassionate divorce and family law attorneys.